A Father’s Role (Eph. 6:4)
grounded exhortation
Dads have a big role. It is often the father that (rightly) bears responsibility for being the main focusing lens through which the kids see, and live within, the world. How the father treats others… How they react to situations… That all inevitably filters into the kids. Paul recognize that and, knowing men often don’t have great empathy, he gives some direct commands.
Be a source of peace: It is very easy to be the source of discord and (quote-unquote) “order” in your house. To antagonize your children because they are frustrating you… or because they aren’t listening… or just because you are truly trying to do what is best for them - but maybe in a less than helpful way.
As the father of the house, let us seek to follow after Christ by not stirring up disunity or anger but instead being the source of peace. Be forgiving. Be calm. Listen with open ears, and a desire to learn and not just correct or “be right.” If you want your house to be peaceful, then you father must be at peace.
For the father of the house to be the source of peace he needs to know the Prince of Peace. It is my duty to be in God’s Word daily. To be in prayer daily. To be seeking production of the Fruit of the Spirit daily. It is so incredibly easy to put your own desires and wants at the top of your list of things to prioritize… thinking these things are what will “create” the peace - but let us all remember that it is only in Christ that we fathers will be a source of peace.
Train Christ-likeness: Fathers, if we want to be the source of peace in our homes we must realize that our homes are more than ourselves. For starters that means we may be the head of the house, but Christ is head over us. Which means that we must be “dying to self” and elevating others as more important than ourselves.
Peace in the home will be drastically elevated if we emphasize the need for Christ every day to our children. Are they impatient? Pray for, example in your actions, and train up the fruit of patience and kindness (when they are impatient with others)! Is it anger? Pray for, example, and train up the fruit of love and forgiveness.
Training Christ-likeness is not a “one-and-done” thing! It isn’t even a “just for the kids” thing. By training Christ-likeness in your kids… you will find the Spirit of Christ working more and more in your own life! You will spend your whole life training your kids… their kids… the kids the LORD puts around you… in the life-long endeavor of being like Christ.
But that goal, especially as a father, is a worthwhile one - and one that we must take seriously and do seriously.
Instruct in the Truth: the Bible must have priority in our households. Whether it be Scripture reading as a family. Singing of hymns and psalms. The LORD’s Prayer. Or even story Bibles for children… we must show a genuine and joy need for God’s Word in our day-to-day lives!
Fathers, do you want peace in your home? Do you want to train your children to be more like Christ each day? Do you expect to do so without the consistent and joyful use of God’s own Word?? It is up to you to know when is best, and what will click best. But it is a non-negotiable that something and some time is necessary. If you and I need God’s Word to speak into our lives every day, how much more do our little ones?
Nowadays our children are bombarded with entertainment (often the kind that instills values that are against Scripture) far more than we can really understand. We have got to be on top of it as their parents, and be sure to make the foundation of their lives is on the Bible. To teach our kids the Truth isto look after the very best you can hope for them.
Do not leave instruction of the Truth of God up to Sunday school teachers or youth leaders. Fathers need to be in the front of the battle that is the upbringing of children. And we must do so in a way that models Christ-likeness and pursues peace in the home.
May Paul’s words here encourage and convict each of us as we follow Christ today, and every day going forward.